Response 2 I think is the most appropriate response because you are aware that Tom needs family support and understand that he might not be able to make that call himself. Response 1 is inappropriate because I didn’t know Mary and my feeling are irrelevant to Tom.
Response 3 would be something that would need to be given to Tom but only when he was ready to leave the hospital.
Response 4 is just rude and shows no empathy to Tom and insensitive.
